begin
5: first time
word count: 4,170
cw//angst, emotional, profanity, death of parent, grief, smut |
|
He frowned, awkwardly giggling, "what do you mean what's happening? I love you. I've missed you, but I always knew we'd be together again. I never stopped loving you. I never will." "What?" You shook your head, before turning around to look away from him, "what are you saying, why are you saying this?" "Because, I mean it," he affirmed, placing his hands on your arms, trying to pull you back against him. "That's…not… possible," you turned around and buried your head into his chest, the only safe place that ever existed for you. Tears, so many tears, you could barely see him in front of you. He'd allowed you to have your moment, the moment he was already expecting, the one he had already prepared for. He smiled to himself thinking, 'if only she would have believed me. If she only knew that this has always been the way I would have been. As if I hadn't been hoping and praying for this…all this time. It was never going to be anyone else, my silly girl, it was always you. It would always be you. It will always be you'.
--
"Has she called?" Namjoon was reluctant to ask Jungkook, but he couldn't just leave things lingering, he was his big brother…he needed to look out for him. "Not yet," Jungkook answered, checking his phone for word from you…a habit he would always have a hard time breaking. "Have you thought about maybe calling her again?" Namjoon's heart broke for JK, he was saddened thinking about how he would ever be happy staying stuck on pause. Left on read, well no, actually…left on heard. "No," Jungkook stated confidently, "I don't want her to feel burdened. She'll call when she's ready to deal with things." "But, bro…fuck man,," Namjoon started, but stopped, shaking his head instead. "Bro, it's fine, don't worry. I'm fine. I knew the risk I was taking, allowing myself to really fall in love with someone that I'd only have for a short while," he stood up, patting Namjoon on the back, "it was worth the risk and I'd do it all over again, exactly the same way. No regrets."
Namjoon was honestly overwhelmed with the maturity for which Jungkook was carrying himself. He didn't know what to do. As his brother, he felt a heavy sense of responsibility for him, he felt like he was putting on a brave face for him. But, at the same time, he seemed ok. As if he'd just accepted that he'd have to wait. He was just going along with his life, as if his heart wasn't broken, as if he wasn't disappointed. Completely content with the fact that he would have you, but he'd just have to wait for you. "Fine," Joon threw his hands up in the air, "but, you have to promise me that if it gets to be too much, if you're going to break under all this weight, you have to tell me so I can help you shoulder the burden." Jungkook smiled, that perfect, 'I promise I'm ok, for real, don't worry, I'm not lying' smile, "I promise. But, bro, just you wait…my Sweets will be mine and back in my arms, one day. I guarantee it." Joon nodded and let it go.
--
"How?" You asked as he led you to his bed, sitting down, then guiding you to sit in his lap, "I just…how?" "How what, Sweets?" He held his hand against your cheek, smiling, his heart had not stopped racing since he first heard your voice. "How do you not hate me?" You asked, truly shocked, overwhelmed, wondering if you were actually just in a dream. He chuckled, "hate you? What? How would I ever hate you? How could I? My heart, soul, being…feels nothing but love for you. I just knew you would be back. And yes, it does suck that it's under these circumstances. But only because I wish that he would've been able to see us together again."
"Jungkook…" You stared at him, speechless, how could he have known. How did he know, without confirmation, without any reassurance…that you were absolutely still and completely in love with him and you'd never stopped loving him.
--
"You know that he totally has the biggest crush on you, girl," your new American best friend turned your attention to the cute boy that had been doing everything possible to get your attention. "Yeah, but I keep telling him I'm taken. I'm not sure why he won't let it go," you shrugged, shaking your head. "Ok, I mean…," she began to ask what she'd been trying so hard not to, "your boyfriend is like the hottest guy I've ever seen, honestly. But, like…he's in another country. And he will be, for like, a long time. You're just gonna long-distance? Really?" You laughed, shaking your head, "you don't know him and why is that so shocking, miss?" "I just," she stared at you wide-eyed, "...couldn't do it."
"If you knew more than how he looked, even though to be honest that would be enough for lots of people," you giggled, your body overcome with heat anytime you thought about Jungkook, "but if you knew him, like I know him. You'd understand. Our connection is like nothing I've ever experienced, I honestly don't even think my parents have the kind of connection we have. So, I know deep in my soul that he is the only one. He's just worth it, worth every sacrifice, every ounce of pain. I just hope that he understands." "Understands?" She asked, confused, "understands what?" "Just…ahhh nothing, it's not important," you shook your head, embarrassed and if you were being completely honest, ashamed, this 'understanding' was something you had to carry on your own.
"Ok, well, so then are you going to the dance on Friday?" She just accepted that you were you and she decided there was no point in continuing, just some 'long-distance' thing that she couldn't relate to. You moved back into the present with her, laughing and talking, as if your heart wasn't completely flooded with guilt and sadness and…disappointment with yourself.
--
"I don't understand," you stood up, heading for the door, but his pull on you held you back and you turned around to actually face things, "I'm so sorry, Jungkook. I'm so sorry I didn't call you back…I'm sorry that I just…" You'd started to cry and within seconds he was wrapping you in his hold, "shhh shhh, it's ok, Sweets. It's ok. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Take your time." He led you back to his bed, inviting you to lay down, as he scooted in behind you…finally holding you again. You let go, all of the pent up anxiety, guilt, and hatred for yourself streamed out of you just like your tears. You held onto his arms around you, feeling the comfort that came with being next to him. It felt good. Too good. You didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve his love, his kindness, his forgiveness.
You turned around to face him, shaking your head, "it's ok to tell me how you really feel. It's ok to tell me how I hurt you. It's ok to be mad, to tell me that I'm the worst. That's what I deserve, babe. Please, just…" He kissed the tear streams on both of your cheeks and shook his head before holding his forehead against yours, "there is nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, that I have for you but my unending, infinite love. I'm not upset. I'm not hurt. I don't wish I could say this or that. The only thing I want is to enjoy that my best friend, my soul mate, my once in a lifetime is right here, in front of me. Mine, again."
"But, don't you want to know why? Don't you want to ask…anything?" You understood his confidence, it was the same one you had, but what you didn't understand was how…when you were the one who pushed pause for 10 years. "Why? I already know the answers to any question I've ever had," he laid back on the bed, pulling you into the perch that belonged to only you on his chest, holding one arm around you and the other up under his head. "Actually, I do have a question," he smirked, "did you notice anything different?" You side smiled, wondering what he was referring to, "about?" He laughed and lifted up to kiss you, before he continued, "Sweets, why are you fighting what you know. You know exactly what I am thinking, because I know exactly all the questions you want me to ask you. So, my love, what am I referring to?"
You didn't even think, you just spoke, "that you're able to control your dick." He burst out laughing, clapping and smiling so big that he couldn't see you for a moment, "exactly. Don't fight it. You may have been hesitant, but I know that you understand what I'm saying. I know you feel our connection. Our beautiful, amazing connection that has allowed us to stay tied together, despite the time and distance. It's real. It's happening. Believe it. Believe in how much I love you and have kept loving you, and only you. Just like you have for me. Believe it, baby, it's me and you." You laid your head on his chest, listening to his heart beat beneath it. "So…" you started, "you didn't either?" "Nope," he smiled and you felt like the energy in the room, the overwhelming force that was your love, burst…so bright, that the lights in his room seemed to dim. "Just like you didn't," he moved his hand down to your face and lifted your gaze up to meet his, "believe it, Sweets. It's true. You and me, have stayed 'you and me' through the last 5,387,400 minutes, 13 seconds and counting.
"I can't believe it," you held your mouth open, feeling shock, but your belief was absolute, "so, you're saying…your flower is still mine to take?" He smirked as he chuckled, sliding his hand down your back, then squeezing your ass, "yes, it is, just like yours is mine. And I believe that the wait has been long enough, wouldn't you say?"
--
"Shhhh," you giggled, leading Jungkook to your hotel room, from the stairwell, "Jin is literally around the corner." You'd taken the elevator to the 14th floor to sneak down to your hotel room, bypassing a potential run in with your parents or brother. He smacked your ass and whispered, "well then, get this door fucking opened, Sweets. We've waited long enough." You hurriedly opened the door and before it had even latched behind the two of you, he was pulling your clothes off, while practically ripping his shirt off. Unbuckling his belt, unzipping his pants, pushing them down with his underwear, allowing his hardness to breathe, having felt suffocated for so long. You stopped for a moment, only panties remaining on your body, as you inhaled slowly, biting down on your lip, taking in his perfect form. "Fuck, Babe," you placed your hands on his chest, before you kissed him and took another look at what you'd been missing, "you are so fucking hot. Goddamn, this body is definitely different than when I was last here."
He chuckled, momentarily shy, before pulling you against his body, "well, I thought to myself, when I'm finally with my Sweets again…I'm not going to ever stop taking her and having her. So, I've been preparing for this exact moment." He lifted you up slowly, taking the time to hold onto your curves, as he felt your skin against his. You held your hands against his cheeks and kissed him, "I love you, Babe." "I love you, too, Sweets," he carried you to the bedroom and gently set you down on the bed.
You looked up at him, as he ran his hands over your body, admiring it, adoring you, taking every last second to appreciate that it was happening, "you are still the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. You're body, your skin, just as soft as I remembered." He gently slid his hand over your breasts, a soft touch against your skin, before he leaned over, taking your nipple into his mouth, slowly sucking. "Fuuuuck," you moaned, feeling the wetness between your legs continue to transfer onto your panties, "oh my god, that feels so good." He lifted his mouth off of you for a moment to tell you, "yes, you do, Sweets. You feel so fucking good."
He slid his tongue down your body, wanting to taste every inch of you, as his hands explored what he hadn't yet tasted. When he reached the thin panties that remained on your body, he continued to worship your form, "these panties are so sexy, because they are on your beautiful body." He kissed the lace, taking his time to breathe you in, savoring your scent, "you smell so good, baby. You're so wet for me, so wet…" He softly ran the back of two of his fingers against the thin lace that clothed your opening, "I'm so grateful to have you here, in front of me. Feeling you against my skin…how turned on you are to be with me." You held your tongue between your lips, feeling your pussy in a consistent state of gushing with your arousal. His words, his tone, the cadence of what and how he was speaking…perfectly complemented the pace to which it already felt he was making love to you.
Your breathing hitched when you felt his fingers slide underneath the lace, "mmm, the wetness feels even better at the source." Your body rose from the bed, as he dipped his fingers into your opening, sweeping through the length of your slit, "oh my god, my beautiful, sexy girl." "Mmmm," you moaned, as your body lifted up on its own into his touch, "so good, so fucking good, Babe." He smiled, before asking, "say it again for me, Sweets." "It feels so fucking good, Babe," you emphasized your nickname for him. He savored the sound of your voice as it flowed into his ears, finding it harder to take his time, his desire to hear you cum propelling him forward as he pulled your panties down and off of your legs.
He spent a few minutes with your feet, sliding his tongue between your toes, as if he was offering you a preview into what was coming. "Oh my god," you moaned, taken by surprise at how turned on you were with him sucking on your toes. He smiled as he began to slide his tongue down your legs, leaving a mark on the inside of each of your thighs. He wanted to take his time with your pussy, so he guided you further back on the bed, and settled between your legs. Again, he breathed you in, committing your scent to his memory, then pushed his tongue into you. Your body lifted up on its own and you moaned, as you gripped onto his hair. He slid his tongue between your folds, studying the movements of your body, taking note when you jerked, listened to when you giggled, moaned and flat out 'holy fucked'.
When he found your bud, he took the time to learn what you liked, which is exactly what you were doing. You couldn't believe that you'd both saved yourselves for each other. And now, with his head between your legs, making you shake and tremble, you thought back to the conversations with your friends in America, 'he's worth it.' "Oh my god," your heartbeat pounded and combined with the waves of arousal that his tongue circling around your clit was pushing over your body, "I think…oh god, yeah, this, OH FUCK, JUNGKOOK, BABE!" Your sounds were suddenly muted and distant, as a rush of pleasure built within your core, before snapping when you felt like you'd floated into outer space, and your body shook, lifted, and released on its own. He held still as his dick twitched against the bedding, trying with all his might to record all of the sounds that were filling the space, as you came onto his tongue. He lapped up what he could, learning about your sensitivities as he adjusted the pace of his licks and softened his sucks.
He pulled away from your opening, taking the time to taste your skin as he moved his body to being on top of you. He held himself above you, as he lowered his mouth to yours, kissing you softly first, but then his kisses became voracious. He had a small worry that maybe he would never be satiated, feeling ravenous in his need for you, but he kept control because as much as he wanted to break you in half, he wanted this first time with you…with anyone, to be everything, and it would only be that if he took his time, continuing to make love to you. He slowed his kiss and sucked on your lips, as he tasted your tongue. He thought to himself that he would never get enough of the way he felt when your tongue was against his. He smiled, stopping for a second to check in with you, "how are you doing, Sweets?"
"Huh, what?" You stated with exaggeration, "I'm still floating amongst the clouds, Babe. Mother fuck, that was amazing. I don't know if I'll be able to allow you to be away from me and my flower." He chuckled, resting his body against yours, as he laid against your chest and held onto your head. You joined in and when he lifted his head to look at you again, you held onto his face, kissing him deeply, before you whispered, "take me, Babe. Don't worry, I'm going to be fine and it's going to be amazing. Have me, I want you to feel like I do." He smiled, not even feigning surprise with how you were reading his mind, "promise me you'll tell me if it hurts or if you're uncomfortable or if I'm too heavy." "Babe, I'm so ready for you, give me that hard dick," you giggled as he laughed, falling in love with you again. He kissed you, before whispering, "I love you." You smiled, placing a gentle touch against his cheek, and affirmed the same, "I love you."
He shifted his body between your legs and tried not to think about hurting you, but he couldn't stop, "Sweets, please, for real, you'll tell me if I'm hurting you, right?" "You are the sweetest boyfriend," you smiled, then reassured him, "I promise, but Babe, remember that I'm not fragile. Don't be afraid, make love to me, cum inside of me, fill me up. I want you, I need you. I love you. Now, give me that D!" He laughed, then started to kiss you again, adjusting himself, aligning his length with your entrance. He took a deep breath and slowly pushed into you. You held onto his shoulders, breathing as he stretched you open, "oh my god…" "What, what, too much," he jumped in quickly. "No, no, Babe," you pulled his hair, "it feels so good. You feel so good. Don't stop, please don't stop."
With that final reassurance, he let go of his fear, because if nothing else, he would know, he would always know. He pulled out slowly, then pushed in slowly again, this time pushing as far in as he could, "still ok?" You smiled, "I'm good, Jungkook." He nodded and pulled out, pushed in, pulled out, pushed in, finally a moan released from his mouth, as he relaxed a bit more. Of course it was slightly painful, but for only a few moments as your walls fully adjusted to accommodating him. "Babe, you can go faster if you want. I've adjusted to your huge thick dick…give it to me," you assured him, pulling him further into you as you wrapped your legs around him. He giggled and started to go a bit faster. He kissed you as he thrust in and out of you, telling you how much he loved you, how good you felt, "oh my god, Sweets. Oh god, baby, you feel so good. My imagination could never…like there is no way…I would have ever, been able to accurately…capture how amazing you feel. How incredible it is to be here with you…inside of you. Oh god, oh god, oh my…"
He held his position, pushed deep inside you, emptying what felt like a 10 year nut bust. His growls and moans, made you feel like you were cumming again, it was the hottest collection of sounds that you'd ever heard. He finally allowed the full weight of his body to lay atop you as he worked to catch his breath. You combed your fingers through his soft hair with one hand, while your other rubbed his back. You both took the time to appreciate and live in the moment. The moment you saved for him and the moment he saved for you. The most beautiful moment in life.
--
You tried to call him again, wanting to let him know that you were being faithful. That he didn't have to worry about you breaking that promise. That he would always be the only one you loved and one day you would be back. But, it was too much to take in, too much to process, too hard to believe. 'What if he doesn't feel it like I do?'
But he does. You know he does.
--
After you made love, fucked, had sex, did the dirty, got nasty…for what seemed like the same amount of time that you'd spent apart, you each finally felt like you'd had close to your fill of each other. "Well, it's going to be hard not doing that all the time…forever," you exhaled exaggeratingly. "Tell me about it, Sweets," he chuckled, as he held you under his arm, close against his body, "I'm gonna be hard like all the time." "So, nothings really changing with you," you teased, both of you laughing.
As you settled into your new shared reality, he ran his hand through your hair, seeming to take in long deep breaths, "I'm so happy right now. Just like that day when we became us." "Me too," you smiled, but now that life was what it was, your heart panged with regret, "I'm so sorry, Babe." "Stop that, Sweets," he lovingly scolded, "no regrets. I only wish you would have believed it sooner so that you weren't carrying around all the guilt you've carried. I thought that maybe you'd hear in my voice when I left that message, that you were free from all of it, but your stubbornness prevented you from taking it in. That's what makes me sad, that you've been hurt all this time."
You couldn't help but to cry, "I've just been going through life, keeping note of everything I want to tell you and telling myself how ridiculous I've been with not telling you. Like why have I waited this long and for your father to…" You stopped, at the same time feeling guilty about the current circumstances. "Shhh, shhh, Sweets, stop torturing yourself. I love you. You love me. We're together…wait, I mean, we are together right?" You chuckled, kissing him slowly, and smiling, "nothing would make me happier. I love you." "I love you," he smiled, kissing the top of your head before you went back to cuddling against his chest.
"Ok, so now that we are official again," he smiled, teasingly adding, "finally." You looked up at him and shook your head, "Babe, you said…" You started to pout and whine and he kissed you, "I'm only joking, my love." You shook your head and smiled, "for real? No joking, you really forgive me and understand?" "Oh, baby," he pulled your lips back to his, "Sweets, I forgive you, even though there is nothing to forgive. Give me your hand." You held your hand closer to him and he held it against his heart, "you feel it don't you, you know I understand. I love you. Believe it…it's me and you." You smiled and kissed his hand that sat on yours, "I believe it, Babe. I believe it."
"Ok, so, catch me up," he started, pulling you in closer against him, as if he just couldn't get you close enough, "tell me about everything." "Everything?" You giggled, "ok, but you'll tell me too, right?" "Of course, silly," he chuckled, "I'm curious to see how often we were actually right next to each other. To me it felt like a lot. What about you?" "Every step of the way," you assured and started to tell him how the last 10 years together, but apart, had been.
--
"Has she called?" Namjoon was reluctant to ask Jungkook, but he couldn't just leave things lingering, he was his big brother…he needed to look out for him. "Not yet," Jungkook answered, checking his phone for word from you…a habit he would always have a hard time breaking. "Have you thought about maybe calling her again?" Namjoon's heart broke for JK, he was saddened thinking about how he would ever be happy staying stuck on pause. Left on read, well no, actually…left on heard. "No," Jungkook stated confidently, "I don't want her to feel burdened. She'll call when she's ready to deal with things." "But, bro…fuck man,," Namjoon started, but stopped, shaking his head instead. "Bro, it's fine, don't worry. I'm fine. I knew the risk I was taking, allowing myself to really fall in love with someone that I'd only have for a short while," he stood up, patting Namjoon on the back, "it was worth the risk and I'd do it all over again, exactly the same way. No regrets."
Namjoon was honestly overwhelmed with the maturity for which Jungkook was carrying himself. He didn't know what to do. As his brother, he felt a heavy sense of responsibility for him, he felt like he was putting on a brave face for him. But, at the same time, he seemed ok. As if he'd just accepted that he'd have to wait. He was just going along with his life, as if his heart wasn't broken, as if he wasn't disappointed. Completely content with the fact that he would have you, but he'd just have to wait for you. "Fine," Joon threw his hands up in the air, "but, you have to promise me that if it gets to be too much, if you're going to break under all this weight, you have to tell me so I can help you shoulder the burden." Jungkook smiled, that perfect, 'I promise I'm ok, for real, don't worry, I'm not lying' smile, "I promise. But, bro, just you wait…my Sweets will be mine and back in my arms, one day. I guarantee it." Joon nodded and let it go.
--
"How?" You asked as he led you to his bed, sitting down, then guiding you to sit in his lap, "I just…how?" "How what, Sweets?" He held his hand against your cheek, smiling, his heart had not stopped racing since he first heard your voice. "How do you not hate me?" You asked, truly shocked, overwhelmed, wondering if you were actually just in a dream. He chuckled, "hate you? What? How would I ever hate you? How could I? My heart, soul, being…feels nothing but love for you. I just knew you would be back. And yes, it does suck that it's under these circumstances. But only because I wish that he would've been able to see us together again."
"Jungkook…" You stared at him, speechless, how could he have known. How did he know, without confirmation, without any reassurance…that you were absolutely still and completely in love with him and you'd never stopped loving him.
--
"You know that he totally has the biggest crush on you, girl," your new American best friend turned your attention to the cute boy that had been doing everything possible to get your attention. "Yeah, but I keep telling him I'm taken. I'm not sure why he won't let it go," you shrugged, shaking your head. "Ok, I mean…," she began to ask what she'd been trying so hard not to, "your boyfriend is like the hottest guy I've ever seen, honestly. But, like…he's in another country. And he will be, for like, a long time. You're just gonna long-distance? Really?" You laughed, shaking your head, "you don't know him and why is that so shocking, miss?" "I just," she stared at you wide-eyed, "...couldn't do it."
"If you knew more than how he looked, even though to be honest that would be enough for lots of people," you giggled, your body overcome with heat anytime you thought about Jungkook, "but if you knew him, like I know him. You'd understand. Our connection is like nothing I've ever experienced, I honestly don't even think my parents have the kind of connection we have. So, I know deep in my soul that he is the only one. He's just worth it, worth every sacrifice, every ounce of pain. I just hope that he understands." "Understands?" She asked, confused, "understands what?" "Just…ahhh nothing, it's not important," you shook your head, embarrassed and if you were being completely honest, ashamed, this 'understanding' was something you had to carry on your own.
"Ok, well, so then are you going to the dance on Friday?" She just accepted that you were you and she decided there was no point in continuing, just some 'long-distance' thing that she couldn't relate to. You moved back into the present with her, laughing and talking, as if your heart wasn't completely flooded with guilt and sadness and…disappointment with yourself.
--
"I don't understand," you stood up, heading for the door, but his pull on you held you back and you turned around to actually face things, "I'm so sorry, Jungkook. I'm so sorry I didn't call you back…I'm sorry that I just…" You'd started to cry and within seconds he was wrapping you in his hold, "shhh shhh, it's ok, Sweets. It's ok. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Take your time." He led you back to his bed, inviting you to lay down, as he scooted in behind you…finally holding you again. You let go, all of the pent up anxiety, guilt, and hatred for yourself streamed out of you just like your tears. You held onto his arms around you, feeling the comfort that came with being next to him. It felt good. Too good. You didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve his love, his kindness, his forgiveness.
You turned around to face him, shaking your head, "it's ok to tell me how you really feel. It's ok to tell me how I hurt you. It's ok to be mad, to tell me that I'm the worst. That's what I deserve, babe. Please, just…" He kissed the tear streams on both of your cheeks and shook his head before holding his forehead against yours, "there is nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, that I have for you but my unending, infinite love. I'm not upset. I'm not hurt. I don't wish I could say this or that. The only thing I want is to enjoy that my best friend, my soul mate, my once in a lifetime is right here, in front of me. Mine, again."
"But, don't you want to know why? Don't you want to ask…anything?" You understood his confidence, it was the same one you had, but what you didn't understand was how…when you were the one who pushed pause for 10 years. "Why? I already know the answers to any question I've ever had," he laid back on the bed, pulling you into the perch that belonged to only you on his chest, holding one arm around you and the other up under his head. "Actually, I do have a question," he smirked, "did you notice anything different?" You side smiled, wondering what he was referring to, "about?" He laughed and lifted up to kiss you, before he continued, "Sweets, why are you fighting what you know. You know exactly what I am thinking, because I know exactly all the questions you want me to ask you. So, my love, what am I referring to?"
You didn't even think, you just spoke, "that you're able to control your dick." He burst out laughing, clapping and smiling so big that he couldn't see you for a moment, "exactly. Don't fight it. You may have been hesitant, but I know that you understand what I'm saying. I know you feel our connection. Our beautiful, amazing connection that has allowed us to stay tied together, despite the time and distance. It's real. It's happening. Believe it. Believe in how much I love you and have kept loving you, and only you. Just like you have for me. Believe it, baby, it's me and you." You laid your head on his chest, listening to his heart beat beneath it. "So…" you started, "you didn't either?" "Nope," he smiled and you felt like the energy in the room, the overwhelming force that was your love, burst…so bright, that the lights in his room seemed to dim. "Just like you didn't," he moved his hand down to your face and lifted your gaze up to meet his, "believe it, Sweets. It's true. You and me, have stayed 'you and me' through the last 5,387,400 minutes, 13 seconds and counting.
"I can't believe it," you held your mouth open, feeling shock, but your belief was absolute, "so, you're saying…your flower is still mine to take?" He smirked as he chuckled, sliding his hand down your back, then squeezing your ass, "yes, it is, just like yours is mine. And I believe that the wait has been long enough, wouldn't you say?"
--
"Shhhh," you giggled, leading Jungkook to your hotel room, from the stairwell, "Jin is literally around the corner." You'd taken the elevator to the 14th floor to sneak down to your hotel room, bypassing a potential run in with your parents or brother. He smacked your ass and whispered, "well then, get this door fucking opened, Sweets. We've waited long enough." You hurriedly opened the door and before it had even latched behind the two of you, he was pulling your clothes off, while practically ripping his shirt off. Unbuckling his belt, unzipping his pants, pushing them down with his underwear, allowing his hardness to breathe, having felt suffocated for so long. You stopped for a moment, only panties remaining on your body, as you inhaled slowly, biting down on your lip, taking in his perfect form. "Fuck, Babe," you placed your hands on his chest, before you kissed him and took another look at what you'd been missing, "you are so fucking hot. Goddamn, this body is definitely different than when I was last here."
He chuckled, momentarily shy, before pulling you against his body, "well, I thought to myself, when I'm finally with my Sweets again…I'm not going to ever stop taking her and having her. So, I've been preparing for this exact moment." He lifted you up slowly, taking the time to hold onto your curves, as he felt your skin against his. You held your hands against his cheeks and kissed him, "I love you, Babe." "I love you, too, Sweets," he carried you to the bedroom and gently set you down on the bed.
You looked up at him, as he ran his hands over your body, admiring it, adoring you, taking every last second to appreciate that it was happening, "you are still the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. You're body, your skin, just as soft as I remembered." He gently slid his hand over your breasts, a soft touch against your skin, before he leaned over, taking your nipple into his mouth, slowly sucking. "Fuuuuck," you moaned, feeling the wetness between your legs continue to transfer onto your panties, "oh my god, that feels so good." He lifted his mouth off of you for a moment to tell you, "yes, you do, Sweets. You feel so fucking good."
He slid his tongue down your body, wanting to taste every inch of you, as his hands explored what he hadn't yet tasted. When he reached the thin panties that remained on your body, he continued to worship your form, "these panties are so sexy, because they are on your beautiful body." He kissed the lace, taking his time to breathe you in, savoring your scent, "you smell so good, baby. You're so wet for me, so wet…" He softly ran the back of two of his fingers against the thin lace that clothed your opening, "I'm so grateful to have you here, in front of me. Feeling you against my skin…how turned on you are to be with me." You held your tongue between your lips, feeling your pussy in a consistent state of gushing with your arousal. His words, his tone, the cadence of what and how he was speaking…perfectly complemented the pace to which it already felt he was making love to you.
Your breathing hitched when you felt his fingers slide underneath the lace, "mmm, the wetness feels even better at the source." Your body rose from the bed, as he dipped his fingers into your opening, sweeping through the length of your slit, "oh my god, my beautiful, sexy girl." "Mmmm," you moaned, as your body lifted up on its own into his touch, "so good, so fucking good, Babe." He smiled, before asking, "say it again for me, Sweets." "It feels so fucking good, Babe," you emphasized your nickname for him. He savored the sound of your voice as it flowed into his ears, finding it harder to take his time, his desire to hear you cum propelling him forward as he pulled your panties down and off of your legs.
He spent a few minutes with your feet, sliding his tongue between your toes, as if he was offering you a preview into what was coming. "Oh my god," you moaned, taken by surprise at how turned on you were with him sucking on your toes. He smiled as he began to slide his tongue down your legs, leaving a mark on the inside of each of your thighs. He wanted to take his time with your pussy, so he guided you further back on the bed, and settled between your legs. Again, he breathed you in, committing your scent to his memory, then pushed his tongue into you. Your body lifted up on its own and you moaned, as you gripped onto his hair. He slid his tongue between your folds, studying the movements of your body, taking note when you jerked, listened to when you giggled, moaned and flat out 'holy fucked'.
When he found your bud, he took the time to learn what you liked, which is exactly what you were doing. You couldn't believe that you'd both saved yourselves for each other. And now, with his head between your legs, making you shake and tremble, you thought back to the conversations with your friends in America, 'he's worth it.' "Oh my god," your heartbeat pounded and combined with the waves of arousal that his tongue circling around your clit was pushing over your body, "I think…oh god, yeah, this, OH FUCK, JUNGKOOK, BABE!" Your sounds were suddenly muted and distant, as a rush of pleasure built within your core, before snapping when you felt like you'd floated into outer space, and your body shook, lifted, and released on its own. He held still as his dick twitched against the bedding, trying with all his might to record all of the sounds that were filling the space, as you came onto his tongue. He lapped up what he could, learning about your sensitivities as he adjusted the pace of his licks and softened his sucks.
He pulled away from your opening, taking the time to taste your skin as he moved his body to being on top of you. He held himself above you, as he lowered his mouth to yours, kissing you softly first, but then his kisses became voracious. He had a small worry that maybe he would never be satiated, feeling ravenous in his need for you, but he kept control because as much as he wanted to break you in half, he wanted this first time with you…with anyone, to be everything, and it would only be that if he took his time, continuing to make love to you. He slowed his kiss and sucked on your lips, as he tasted your tongue. He thought to himself that he would never get enough of the way he felt when your tongue was against his. He smiled, stopping for a second to check in with you, "how are you doing, Sweets?"
"Huh, what?" You stated with exaggeration, "I'm still floating amongst the clouds, Babe. Mother fuck, that was amazing. I don't know if I'll be able to allow you to be away from me and my flower." He chuckled, resting his body against yours, as he laid against your chest and held onto your head. You joined in and when he lifted his head to look at you again, you held onto his face, kissing him deeply, before you whispered, "take me, Babe. Don't worry, I'm going to be fine and it's going to be amazing. Have me, I want you to feel like I do." He smiled, not even feigning surprise with how you were reading his mind, "promise me you'll tell me if it hurts or if you're uncomfortable or if I'm too heavy." "Babe, I'm so ready for you, give me that hard dick," you giggled as he laughed, falling in love with you again. He kissed you, before whispering, "I love you." You smiled, placing a gentle touch against his cheek, and affirmed the same, "I love you."
He shifted his body between your legs and tried not to think about hurting you, but he couldn't stop, "Sweets, please, for real, you'll tell me if I'm hurting you, right?" "You are the sweetest boyfriend," you smiled, then reassured him, "I promise, but Babe, remember that I'm not fragile. Don't be afraid, make love to me, cum inside of me, fill me up. I want you, I need you. I love you. Now, give me that D!" He laughed, then started to kiss you again, adjusting himself, aligning his length with your entrance. He took a deep breath and slowly pushed into you. You held onto his shoulders, breathing as he stretched you open, "oh my god…" "What, what, too much," he jumped in quickly. "No, no, Babe," you pulled his hair, "it feels so good. You feel so good. Don't stop, please don't stop."
With that final reassurance, he let go of his fear, because if nothing else, he would know, he would always know. He pulled out slowly, then pushed in slowly again, this time pushing as far in as he could, "still ok?" You smiled, "I'm good, Jungkook." He nodded and pulled out, pushed in, pulled out, pushed in, finally a moan released from his mouth, as he relaxed a bit more. Of course it was slightly painful, but for only a few moments as your walls fully adjusted to accommodating him. "Babe, you can go faster if you want. I've adjusted to your huge thick dick…give it to me," you assured him, pulling him further into you as you wrapped your legs around him. He giggled and started to go a bit faster. He kissed you as he thrust in and out of you, telling you how much he loved you, how good you felt, "oh my god, Sweets. Oh god, baby, you feel so good. My imagination could never…like there is no way…I would have ever, been able to accurately…capture how amazing you feel. How incredible it is to be here with you…inside of you. Oh god, oh god, oh my…"
He held his position, pushed deep inside you, emptying what felt like a 10 year nut bust. His growls and moans, made you feel like you were cumming again, it was the hottest collection of sounds that you'd ever heard. He finally allowed the full weight of his body to lay atop you as he worked to catch his breath. You combed your fingers through his soft hair with one hand, while your other rubbed his back. You both took the time to appreciate and live in the moment. The moment you saved for him and the moment he saved for you. The most beautiful moment in life.
--
You tried to call him again, wanting to let him know that you were being faithful. That he didn't have to worry about you breaking that promise. That he would always be the only one you loved and one day you would be back. But, it was too much to take in, too much to process, too hard to believe. 'What if he doesn't feel it like I do?'
But he does. You know he does.
--
After you made love, fucked, had sex, did the dirty, got nasty…for what seemed like the same amount of time that you'd spent apart, you each finally felt like you'd had close to your fill of each other. "Well, it's going to be hard not doing that all the time…forever," you exhaled exaggeratingly. "Tell me about it, Sweets," he chuckled, as he held you under his arm, close against his body, "I'm gonna be hard like all the time." "So, nothings really changing with you," you teased, both of you laughing.
As you settled into your new shared reality, he ran his hand through your hair, seeming to take in long deep breaths, "I'm so happy right now. Just like that day when we became us." "Me too," you smiled, but now that life was what it was, your heart panged with regret, "I'm so sorry, Babe." "Stop that, Sweets," he lovingly scolded, "no regrets. I only wish you would have believed it sooner so that you weren't carrying around all the guilt you've carried. I thought that maybe you'd hear in my voice when I left that message, that you were free from all of it, but your stubbornness prevented you from taking it in. That's what makes me sad, that you've been hurt all this time."
You couldn't help but to cry, "I've just been going through life, keeping note of everything I want to tell you and telling myself how ridiculous I've been with not telling you. Like why have I waited this long and for your father to…" You stopped, at the same time feeling guilty about the current circumstances. "Shhh, shhh, Sweets, stop torturing yourself. I love you. You love me. We're together…wait, I mean, we are together right?" You chuckled, kissing him slowly, and smiling, "nothing would make me happier. I love you." "I love you," he smiled, kissing the top of your head before you went back to cuddling against his chest.
"Ok, so now that we are official again," he smiled, teasingly adding, "finally." You looked up at him and shook your head, "Babe, you said…" You started to pout and whine and he kissed you, "I'm only joking, my love." You shook your head and smiled, "for real? No joking, you really forgive me and understand?" "Oh, baby," he pulled your lips back to his, "Sweets, I forgive you, even though there is nothing to forgive. Give me your hand." You held your hand closer to him and he held it against his heart, "you feel it don't you, you know I understand. I love you. Believe it…it's me and you." You smiled and kissed his hand that sat on yours, "I believe it, Babe. I believe it."
"Ok, so, catch me up," he started, pulling you in closer against him, as if he just couldn't get you close enough, "tell me about everything." "Everything?" You giggled, "ok, but you'll tell me too, right?" "Of course, silly," he chuckled, "I'm curious to see how often we were actually right next to each other. To me it felt like a lot. What about you?" "Every step of the way," you assured and started to tell him how the last 10 years together, but apart, had been.
